iTunes Advent Calendar: Day 12

I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)

The Proclaimers

The Best of the Proclaimers

Genre: Rock

Blah, Blah, Blah: “My, my…Mr. Ihnatko seems to fancy himself as quite the highbrow snooty music expert, doesn’t he? Some of these Advent Calendar blatherings aren’t merely pretentious…they’re downright pretwentytious.”

Okey-doke. To help balance things out, today I present The Proclaimers. Why do I like this song?

Because they have funny foreign voices.

I like to exaggerate their Scottish accents while I sing along:

Ooond EHHHH woood wouk foive HOON-dred moyles oond AYYYY woood wok foive HOON-dret moohrrrre…

To find the “sweet spot” for this accent, just keep pushing it up and up and up, further and further into the extreme. Start at Craig Ferguson, move past Billy Connolly, and then work your way through Scrooge McDuck and Groundskeeper Willie. When the accent becomes so extreme that it actually becomes racist, back it down exactly one notch and bang, you’re there.

I think you’ll enjoy the results.

Why I Bought It In The First Place: I know there’s a connection to “Trainspotting.” I’ve just checked IMDB and Wikipedia and was surprised to discover that “500 Miles” isn’t on the soundtrack. I don’t have my DVD handy and I can’t be arsed to screen it again just to check if the song’s actually in there anyway. So I guess after spending an hour and a half listening to Scottish accents that were so thick that X-rays couldn’t penetrate through, it simply got me thinking of these guys again.

4 thoughts on “iTunes Advent Calendar: Day 12

  1. Ross

    Saw them playing a free gig in Ayre a few summers back. Some of the cheesiest songs ever written but you’ve got to love them! No link with Trainspotting that I’m aware of, though. They did make it onto the soundtrack of Shrek with the superior “I’m on my way”…

  2. Ian Crawford

    Hi Sir Ihnatko, two birds one stone if I may. A Scot living in Cambridge England where I saw the boys recently. Excellent night, great music and a bit of a regenerist cult over here. Just bought your book today, iPhone fully loaded. Why the off scale photos of the iPhone? I like the size you use but was it wishful thinking or what? Thought about spilling some coffee on the enormous careless megacorporations other copies but due regard for the law stopped me, sorry!!

    merry christmas and kind regards


  3. Ihnatko Post author

    @Ian – Just more iPhone to love, wouldn’t you say? :)

    Thanks for buying the book…! Do post about it on Amazon and elsewhere if you’re so inclined…it’s helping!

    I’m glad the Proclaimers are still out there playing. I really respect acts like the Proclaimers and Thomas Dolby etc. who have a couple of monster hits but who keep on working long afterwards.

    A couple of years ago I was at a community Independence Day celebration and the big concert on the village green was John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band. They had a couple of hits in the Eighties (propelled by a big movie that used their music) and I’m sure that a lot of people in the crowd thought that crimeny, isn’t it sad that they haven’t hung it up already? But immediately it became clear that the band just loves being musicians and loves playing for an audience.

  4. Mystery Tramp

    The Proclaimers rock. Sunshine on Leith is one of the top 4 albums of all time. Five Hundred Miles, btw, IS on a soundtrack. Check Benny & Joon (Johnny Depp and Mary Stuart Masterson.) They also have a song on Mama’s Boy with Diane Keaton and Jon Heder.


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