CoWA Day 1: Jennifer Connelly’s Breasts

Power Girl convention sketch by Adam Hughes.

I’d had the iPad for more than a week before it truly became “mine.” I had it well before the release date, yes, but until I was done writing about it and demonstrating it on TV, it had to remain simply “an” iPad. If I were demonstrating the Mail app on live television and the whole world knew that I was trying to rent out a theater for a massive “Gossip Girl” season-finale viewing party…well, that simply wouldn’t do.

So when I got home from New York on Friday, I was finally able to replace all of its sample, demonstration, and test content with my personal data. At that time, I also officially changed its name to the one that had come to me in a flash sometime on Day Two of my testing.

I probably shouldn’t tell you what it is. The OS uses the name to identify this iPad to a network. But it’s a good one and I’m keeping it. However, after my first day at the Conference On World Affairs at the University of Colorado in Boulder, I learned its true identity:

This iPad is Jennifer Connelly’s breasts.

See, I learned exactly what it’s like to be the star of “The Hot Spot,” “Career Opportunities” and “Mulholland Falls.” Everywhere I went — the speakers’ office, Monday evening’s party, and even during my panels — everyone was really happy I was there but it was the same story. It quickly became clear that while they liked me as a person, they mostly thought of me as the support and mobility system for two big, meaty, luscious things.

Namely, my iPad, plus the MiFi mobile WiFi access point that would let them see the Netflix streaming app in operation.

It didn’t help that when I was checking my schedule and mail before heading to my next panel, I’d be holding the iPad at chest-level, like the Statue of Liberty.

“Hey! My eyes are up here, fellah.”

No kidding. My first panel yesterday was about Twitter. The basic form of a Conference On World Affairs panel is for each of the speakers to talk for about ten minutes, and then the floor is opened up for questions.

Well before a time when there were no more questions about Twitter, someone raised her hand and asked “If there are no more questions about Twitter, could Andy tell us what he thinks about his iPad?”

I offered to talk to her about it after the panel was over.

There were a couple more on-topic questions. But soon enough, well, yeah…everybody just wanted to know what I thought about the iPad. So that was the last ten minutes of the session.

Next, I was on a panel about the disappearing middle class. I led off, spoke for nine minutes, and felt that I’d done pretty much OK for someone who isn’t an economist or a sociologist. Near the end, I’d used the iPad in front of me as an example of consumer spending. The point was that it’s fine to buy something like this for practical reasons, but buying it because “it’s what the cool people with money are buying” is self-destructive; I’d likened it to all of those people who bought homes they couldn’t afford because it would make them feel good about “living the American dream” or somesuch.

Later, a panelist who really knew the economics angle cold — he’s a columnist for The Financial Times — referred back to that comment. But he abruptly stopped in the middle of his thought.

“Do you keep that in a case, Andy?”

He’d caught me off-guard. It’s not customary to direct questions to fellow panelists during your 10 minutes. I’d been listening closely. Jurek Martin always leaves me impressed with his ability to speak plainly and powerfully. uBt I struggled to imagine how it fit into his remarks.

“I’m sorry…?”

“Do you just carry it around with you in your hands, or do you have to carry it in a bag? I imagine that might be inconvenient…”

And then I gave Jurek the usual answer: that yes, it’s big for a mobile device but no bigger than it needs to be…and that it presents no more problems than carrying around a book or a magazine. A fellow sitting in the front row stepped forward and handed Jurek his own iPad, snug in its Apple convertible case.

The iPad was a superstar on my first day at the conference. Not for the attention it got; for its performance. It underscored every positive impression it made upon me during the week when I wasn’t allowed to use it in public.

1) The battery life is spot-on. I was using my iPad from the moment I awoke at 8 AM to just before I sloped into a car to go back to my house at 8:30 PM. In between, if I ever had the slightest notion to do something with the iPad, I did it without any thought as to the need to “keep some battery in reserve for emergencies.” In the end, I still had 30% battery left…about three hours’ worth.

2) The iPad shone through in the “I need to write and publish something straight away, even though I didn’t plan ahead and bring a real keyboard” scenario.

I had imagined that it would. But yesterday was the first real-world test case. While sitting in the back listening to a panel, I checked my email and found an invitation to an Apple event on Thursday. I wrote about 500 words about it using the virtual keyboard, edited it, and published it to my blog. As I’d expected, I couldn’t type as quickly or as accurately as I can on my MacBook keyboard, but even with this little slate balanced between my knees I was typing fast and naturally.

It’s a perfectly usable keyboard. With the added advantage that when I don’t need a keyboard, it goes away completely. Big, big win all around.

3) The iPad is the perfect choice when discretion is important. You can only imagine how many different kinds of computers I’ve had in front of me at the Conference On World Affairs over the past 10+ years. Today, someone came up and told me he remembered all the way back to when I had a Newton Messagepad up there on the stage.

At the CoWA (and many other conferences) I don’t use a computer for slides. I just use it for reference. The screen keeps a rundown of the points I want to make, in their order, as well of a list of any names or data that I need to mention. I might also want to open a browser window and check on a fact or two.

Good stuff. But I don’t like using a full notebook up there. To the audience, it looks like I’m dividing my time between my participation on the panel and my Twittering about how awesome last night’s “Amazing Race” was.

The iPad is the first computer that scored tens all the way across the board. The screen is viewable from any angle; I can just keep it lying flat on the table and still read the screen perfectly. It has a big screen, so I don’t need to squint and hunt to find my place in my notes. And it’s fast and it’s powerful and has a big, typeable keyboard. So when another panelist spoke about the Citizens United case (the Supreme Court case that says “corporations have the same free speech rights as individual citizens”) I could pull up SCOTUSWiki and refamiliarize myself with it in a way that wouldn’t be distracting to anybody else in the room.

4) Carrying it around isn’t a hassle. Not in the least. Yup, you’re going to want to have a bag of some kind with you. I refer back to my earlier comment about the inconvenience of carrying books and magazines. I normally have a smaller version of my Indiana Jones satchel with me at conferences. The difference is that I’ve just deleted about four or five pounds from my normal load: My 1.5 pound iPad takes the place of a 5.5 pound MacBook plus its charger.

The most important point is that the iPad does a better job in this environment than a MacBook or any other notebook. I slide it out of the newspaper pocket of my bag, click the Home button, and it’s awake and ready to assist. When I’m done, I click the Power button and slide it back; no need to wait for the machine to Sleep or the hard drive to spin down.

And I don’t even think about battery life. So I use it all the time.

I can also use it in environments where a notebook — even a netbook — would be awkward at best or inappropriate at worst. Can you use a netbook while you’re standing up? Kind of. Sort of. Not really. But the iPad is just as handy when I’m waiting in line somewhere as it is when I’m sitting at a table. Only when you finally have a computer like the iPad do you realize how often you need to do something on a computer when you’re standing.

My review of the iPad was very positive. It was also very academic, thanks to the fact that the iPad was under house arrest.

I wish I could go back and add a whole new section to it, now that I’ve taken it on trains on spent eight hours in an airport and on a plane with it and a whole day at a conference. Lend someone an iPad for a day and you’ve got yourself an Apple customer for life.

34 thoughts on “CoWA Day 1: Jennifer Connelly’s Breasts”

  1. And then there’s the added benefit of screwing with the Twitter accounts of people who leave themselves logged in after trying out your iPad…

  2. “Lend someone an iPad for a day and you’ve got yourself an Apple customer for life.”

    This last line is pure and classic Andy! The first time I ever saw a Newton MessagePad and a Palm III, I knew this would the start of amazing things to come. I’m still waiting for it to come to Canada, but the more I read about it, I more I feel like driving 3 hours to Albany and picking one up before hand.

  3. Wow, you’re so right about the difference between “an” iPad and “my” iPad. When you set up any kind of computer with your personal data, settings, wallpaper, and especially when you get your iPhone or iPad apps on arranged in the order you like, you’ve inadvertently forged a relationship with it. I know I get a twinge of anxiety when I pass my iPhone off to a friend who wants to “just look something up real quick”. I imagine I’ll feel the same way (more so?) once I get my hands on an iPad.

    Also, the idea of not having to bring a charger around with me is so awesome.

  4. The more that people describe how they are using this – the more I am interested. When first announced I was wondering how I would make use of the devise. It was quick to see that it would work great for 85% of what I needed to do, but what about the other 15% on the road. The truth is that out of my 100% of computing, that 15% is always done on my main machine at home. I don’t have a need for a machine that can do everything while I am away. Instead of buying a laptop I think that this might be a real alternative.

    Too bad I wasn’t in the market for a laptop just now, then it might get a true trial. I would love it if Apple would give me a trial run on one of these. What happens if after I buy it I find there is something it can’t do that I can’t live without.

    I am going to get an iPhone :)

  5. My ‘edPad’ and MiFi get all the attention these days, Andy. I understand what you are going through with Jen’s breasts. Showed off the Pad at a cast party last Saturday. There was some skepticism till I loaded YouTube. I actually allowed ‘eDpad’ out of my hands as the non-believers became droolers!

  6. Great article, I have a feeling we’ll see more of this as time goes on and people start integrating the iPad into their daily-flow.

    I think Ars Technica has the right idea: hold off for a few days, gather this kind of data, then do one of their 10-20 page mega-reviews. Understand that isn’t really possible for the print-media business, but oh well.

    Also: Leo must steal this title for MBW today! :-)

  7. Thanks for the article Andy. Your pieces always seem to cut through the bull and speak some sense. PH

  8. Thanks, Andy. The last several days, I have been totally fixated on reading and watching iPad reviews and commentary. Mentioning Jennifer Connelly’s breasts restored balance to my universe.

  9. I think some time with it is what it will take to convince a lot of people. I know some friends who picked it up at the store and dismissed it because it was “too heavy” compared to a Kindle, yet they don’t complain about their laptops. *sigh* They’ll get there once tablet computing becomes more prevalent.

  10. Yeah, this is all swell, but I’d love to put this nifty wallpaper I just cooked up in Photoshop on my iPad. But I can’t. No wifi here at work and there’s no cabling the photo into iTunes without wiping all my data. Can’t put on this video podcast I want to watch at lunch, either. I should have learned this lesson with the iPhone. Some “new paradigm.” This kind of stuff was annoying on a phone, but on a tablet??? I’ve been running into similar roadblocks for three days.

  11. Figured it out. GoodReader lets me slide all types of media into iTunes under the Apps tab, right into the iPad data space. Doesn’t try to wipe my data cuz it’s linked to my home computer. Awesome.

  12. Hey Andy, don’t you quickly run up against the 5 Gig “unlimited” cap when streaming movies over your MiFi?

  13. andy, just wondering… you’ve been giving the ipad great reviews. haven’t you come across this wifi problem that a lot of us are experiencing? my ipad is giving such intermittent results, it’s driving me crazy. just walking from one room to another (10 yard difference) is costing me 3 bars. whereas my 3Gs keeps its full 4 bars even one floor separated from my airport. your glowing reviews were one of the things that convinced me to early adopt, but you never mentioned anything about poor wifi performance. so you haven’t come across any problems with your ipad’s reception? cheers, dc

  14. @Gavin: you have an excellent point about iPad as a something to lend vs. iPad as something very personal. To speak it in Mr. Ihnatko’s wonderful language, you wouldn’t lend Jennifer Connelley’s breasts to just anybody.

    With all of the firewalls in the iPhone/iPad file system, it makes you wonder: just how hard would it be to have a switch somewhere that would hide away all of your personal data so you could safely lend your device to someone else. It’s kinda like putting a long plain overcoat over Ms. Connelley — a universal “demo mode”. When the magic switch was switched back, all all of the original assets would be restored (so to speak).

    I doubt if Apple would do this. On the other hand, if one-day-lendings could have a huge impact on sales, it might be worthwhile.

  15. I’ll admit I was skeptical about how this device fits into a person’s tech arsenal between a laptop and a phone. In my mind it needs to replace one of those two devices in order for me find it usefull. Obviously it is not replacing my phone so it really needs to be a laptop replacement. From what you have described it seems like it will almost do that. I think a few more revs of the OS and it will be able to do that.

  16. Hey Andy are you experiencing the wifi problems and if so what did you do to fix them? I’ve tried Apple’s suggestion and all the ones from the forums. I just need to know if it can/will be fixed with an update or if we need to return it while we still have the 14 days.

  17. Superb looking product you got here. I’m most certainly interested and I certainly liked visiting your blog. I am going to have to put this into my feed reader and come back again sometime down the line. Thanks

  18. Hi Andy. Thank you so much for the real life review! I really can’t wait to get my hands on one and am waiting for the 3G to emerge. I do have one question though, if you have a moment to comment. Can it save files? Specifically, I work in medicine and I get PDF attachments (articles) by email or download them from our education site. Does it offer a way to save these anywhere (iWork, Dropbox, etc)? It would be great not to have to search the web or reopen my email every time I want to find these.

    Thanks in advance. I know you are busy, but if you have a little insight into this, it would be awesome.

    Jim

  19. Thanks for your great articles Andy. I was first to get one in my town, and then I made the ultimate sacrifice and let my wife take it on her trip (henpecked or genius?). I wish there was an app to make a transparent file system, although Goodreader is FANTASTIC for accessing PDFs on my iDisk, making onboard storage less of an issue as long as i am online.

    PS: Jim C… I work in medicine as well. I am hopeful for an iPad version of our EMR. As I mentioned above, Goodreader has totally solved my PDF/Doc reading needs- it accesses my idisk directly. I think it can do alot more than I am using it for. Check it out for .99

  20. PS, has anyone figured out a way to download more than one app at a time? Its really annoying to get “kicked out” of the app store each time I download and have to navigate back the search area…

  21. I suppose it’s a buzzkill and will ruin the mood, but I thought maybe we had sort of outgrown reducing accomplished actors to “two big meaty luscious things.” Guess not.

  22. I suspect Andy isn’t seeing the same Wi-Fi problems other iPad users are seeing, since he’s using a mobile Mi-Fi access point; his Wi-Fi ‘router’ isn’t ever more than a couple of feet away from his iPad, and because he knows it’s with him, he doesn’t have to leave the iPad set to discover other Wi-Fi networks or ask to join them.

    Based on the proposed work-arounds for the the Wi-Fi problem I’ve seen, if you have the kind of set-up Andy does, you probably aren’t worrying about or even noticing the issue.

    I am *so* going to get myself in trouble, though, when I get my own iPad and the person whose breasts I name it after finally asks to try it out. ‘Playing with the iPad’ will have a totally different meaning in her mind, I’m sure…

  23. I thought maybe we had sort of outgrown reducing accomplished actors

    Sigh. Andy is saying THE EXACT OPPOSITE of what you seem to think he’s saying. To ruin humor/satire by explaining it: Andy is observing (not endorsing) unfortunate, objectifying behavior that women experience and making a tongue-in-cheek comparison to his own not-so-bad plight.

    Even if you’re totally unfamiliar with Andy’s style, I don’t know how you can possibly make this mistake.

  24. @ Jon

    I’ve taken a peek at Goodreader and will have to explore more. Is it possible to annotate in it? I know I ask too much – I was hoping that Papers would let you do this, but it doesn’t seem to support annotation. That’s the nail in the coffin for me.

    As for the EMR, well, I’m in an ED. So unless Citrix (we have Powerchart – ugh!) gets their act together (like that will happen) or I VPN it, it will likely forever remain a dream to me.

  25. For a long time, most of our PC’s have been ‘sit down computers’. You sit down in front of a keyboard and a monitor when you want to use the device. That is true even for laptops: You may carry them around like a portable device. But when you want to use them, you still sit down and set them on your lap, or a nearby surface, and interact in the same way as a desktop.

    These computing devices have never been very good as ‘walking around’ computers. For that, you want a device that works more like a clipboard, something that you can hold with one hand, and operate with the other, or even something small that can be held and operated with the same hand.

    The computer industry has been trying to develop good ‘walking around’ computers for a long time. Past attempts include the Newton Message pad, Palm PDA’s, Windows and Linux based PC’s that converted into tablets, Windows CE devices, and Smart Phones. While some of the early devices found success in niche markets, or with avid gadget geeks, most were judged as commercial flops. I’d credit Palm with coming up with the first ‘walking around’ device that achieved a reasonable level of consumer acceptance. The iPhone took that market to another level. The iPad seems to be a further evolution of the ‘walking around computer’. It is the first large screen device that has been heavily optimized for the ‘walking around’ experience. (It also has some limited capabilities as a sitdown device, so it might also be considered a hybrid device.)

    I’m sure that this category is going to continue to get bigger, because there are just so many situations where ‘sit down devices’ are inconvenient. It is a market which, until now, hasn’t been well served. It is clear that we are about to see an explosion of larger ‘walking around devices’. Some with copy the iPad. Others will go off in a different direction (MS Courier?). I also hope we will see further refinement in convertible netbook/tablet devices, so that you can have your sit down computer and walking around computer in one package, with fewer compromises on capabilities and features.

    However, just because this (and future) ‘walking around computers’ are likely to become very common, I will be very surprised if ‘sit down computers’ now become obsolete. The keyboard/mouse/large screen monitor interface is still going to be a superior interface for many kinds of heavy duty or more sophisticated computing tasks.

  26. Andy: I have followed your groovy advice for ages via the Sun Times. I am an Apple loving WordPress blogging singer from Chicago who is not of technology – I love it – but I’m not exactly a tech geek. You totally help the consumer visualize why a particular product is necessary:

    “But the iPad is just as handy when I’m waiting in line somewhere as it is when I’m sitting at a table. Only when you finally have a computer like the iPad do you realize how often you need to do something on a computer when you’re standing.”

    Love that!

  27. The Hand Is Thicker Than The Eye
    How to make the iPad the “Content Creation” device it was meant to be.

    As my meaty fingers glided across the touch screen of an iPad for the first time, I found myself thinking about Dr. Patel, the amazing Orlando surgeon. Dr. Patel emerges from the OR four times each day without a drop of blood on his lime-colored scrubs. That is because during surgery, he is in the next room controlling something called the DaVince Robotic Arm. As the founder and head of the Global Robotics Institute, Dr. Patel is the world’s leading practitioner of non-invasive, robotic prostatectomies (surgical removal of the prostate gland). I knew about the many benefits of this advanced medical technique — short hospital stays, rapid recovery, fewer side effects — when I asked Dr. Patel, a few years ago: “What is your major advantage, as a surgeon, in using the robotic arm?” His answer was quick and surprising. “No hands!” He explained that with conventional surgery, his field of vision is constantly blocked by “my big fat hands.” But with a robot arm, he can see the most minute structures clearly and perform his job with an amazing level of precision.

    Much has been touted about the iPad’s “natural” touch/tap interface. The noble mouse, having served us dutifully for lo these past 25 years, is now being put out to pasture. “It’s so much more intuitive to just point at what you want and just move it with your finger!” This is very true. Even Jewish grandmothers and small children can quickly and easily grasp the workings of the iPad’s user interface. The metaphor is obvious because, really, there is no metaphor. You want it? Push it. Move it. Tap it. Slide it. Flip it. It’s fun and it’s natural — but, I’m here to point out, only on one side of the coin.

    Steve Jobs boasted that the iPad would not only fill the niche between smart phone and laptop, it would outshine both of them. That means it is in the iPad’s destiny to be not merely a content consumption device, like an iPhone or iPod touch, but also a content creation device, like your trusty laptop,

    The touch/tap interface is just dandy when it comes to the first, but, alas falls short when going for the second. Flipping album covers to find the song you want to hear, turning pages of a book you want to read, controlling flying widgets in a game you wish to play — all these tasks work great with fingertip control. But what about the article you wish to write? The photo you wish to edit? The illustration you wish to paint? Hmmm? You’ve got Dr. Patel’s “big fat hand” problem to deal with.

    Can you truly expect your fingertip to be as nimble as an I-beam cursor when trying to insert a letter between the “f’ and the “l” of an onscreen ligature in 12 point type? Can you expect to control fine bezier points in your raster graphic logo you’re creating in Adobe Illustrator? And what about Photoshop? Half of your image will be hidden under your “big fat hand!” Try it and I guarantee you will soon be yearning for that delicate tiny paintbrush cursor.

    What’s the answer? I think it’s pretty simple. Two words: Virtual Touchpad. Just as a laptop’s keyboard exists in a virtual state when needed on the iPad, a similar virtual representation of a laptop’s touchpad would be a simple matter to create. Positioned in the lower right or left corner of the screen, the artist, writer, photographer will be able to control an onscreen cursor just like he or she does on a laptop. Fingers can still be used for macro movements, like highlighting a paragraph or selecting a slide in Keynote. But as soon as the virtual touchpad is tapped, a cursor appears and the user is able to perform all the fine motor functions needed to create his or her next masterpiece.

    Many of the questions that existed surrounding the implementation of the iPhone OS as a content creation platform were answered with the developer’s preview of iPhone OS 4.0 on April 8. With the advent of folders (something I had expected at the time of the original iPad announcement in January) and multi-tasking, the iPad is growing ever closer to replacing the laptop as the dominant personal computing platform.

    A cursory run through Apple’s iWork Suite for iPad clearly points the direction in which this platform is headed. Numbers is a joy to behold, but start finagling a truckload of actual numbers, and you will be hungering for that spiffy little arrow cursor you have known and loved for all these years.

    While the 4.0 announcement failed to deliver one of the key components needed to turn the iPad into a true content creation machine — mainly, the introduction of system-level printing — I still feel that Apple is imagining a future that will allow users to fully deploy their iPads without the need for another computer. I am confident that third party printer drivers will soon come online and make printed output directly from the iPad a reality.

    The bombshell contained in the 4.0 announcement, of course, was Apple’s foray into advertising with iAd. While the media reported this as a shot across Google’s bow in their ongoing “rivalry” coverage, the fact is that this move is simply another front in Apple’s ongoing push to move more hardware. Jobs understands that the success of the iPhone is largely due to the amazingly vast array of apps available for it. He correctly believes that apps will drive sales of the iPad as well. But a bigger and better device needs bigger and better apps. And those cost money to make. Jobs wants to create an exclusive revenue stream that will only be available to developers on the iPhone, iPad and iPod touch. Creating an infrastructure that will allow for ad placement inside of their products will result in more and better apps and that will sell more Apple branded devices. It’s a bold strategy that, quite honestly, may not work. But one thing is certain. Ads on Apple devices will be worlds apart from Google Adsense ads. Look at the difference between reading a book on a Kindle versus iBooks on an iPad to see what I mean.

    When Jobs spoke about creating ads that are on the intersection of interactivity and emotion, he succinctly encapsulated a brilliant and profound new advertising ethos. Melding the interactivity of current online ads (which are devoid of any bite or emotion) with static, but emotion-laden TV commercials, to create a synthesis that will deliver a one-two punch to the brain and the heart. Or to put it McLuhanistically, placing a cool message into a hot medium.

    Jobs made a highly disingenuous comment during the Q & A following the keynote when he said that: “We’re babes in the woods when it comes to advertising.” By laying out the iAd strategy in this way, Jobs demonstrated that he is anything but. He and Apple enjoy a deeper understanding and a clearer vision of the true future of advertising than Google or any other player.

    And, after all, isn’t a clear vision what we are all seeking — be it in the operating room or on the screen of our new iPads.

  28. I found 3 reactions when using it (day 2 as an owner here…)

    One is slight annoyance when I can’t immediately figure out the gesture is to do what I want in under 3 seconds, or look for a feature I feel should be there that isn’t. I think much of this is unlearning what you’ve learned so that you can learn more (problem is, that just means you have to unlearn more next time around — a vicious cycle, that). It reminds me of switching from a PC to a Mac (3 years ago) where I had to unlearn convoluted work flows and excessive mouse clicks and instill simpler, quicker, more elegant work flows. I just needed screen time to adjust the muscle memory. Sad to say it took the better part of a year.

    The most common reaction are the “whoa” moments, as in, “Whoa, that’s cool!”

    Less often, but deeper and quieter are the “Wow” or OMG moments. These are when you get a glimpse of what this device might mean going forward, but you can’t make it out fully. It’s a feeling that hits you first, actually, rather than being able to do a logical breakdown of it. It brings us closer to “I think, therefore I do” than we were before (Descartes can be found in there somewhere.)

    Jobs and crew mentioned how intimate this device is. Others mention how the hardware and OS dissolve away, and you immerse into the app. True. It’s subtle but profound. And I am finding that returning to the regular Mac is just as subtly off-putting. The use of the mouse, arrow keys, tabs, etc. seems “distancing”, less immediate and slightly stilted as a result.

    I’m curious if anyone else has encountered that.

    (btw, it’s nice to stumble upon a comment thread about the iPad that doesn’t resemble and devolve into a vitriolic Tea Party vs Dem debate…)

  29. Great commentary as always Andy; really enjoying your coverage and insights on Apple in all forms: CST, This site, and of course Macbreak Weekly. Looking forward to the ipad book!

  30. Props on the wonderful Adam Hughes Sketch. Power Girl is the perfect art for Jennifer Connely’s breasts.

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